What Up Dog?

Guess what this is... It's a sex toy for dogs. You heard me; an artificial rubber female-shaped dog doll with a silicone dog "vagina" that male dogs can mount and have real dog sex with. Rover's new best friend is called the DoggieLoveDoll and it's brought to us by a Brazilian company called PetSmiling. I bet they are.

In case you're wondering, the bogus bitch has easy to grasp hips and the entry point does include "an easy to clean reservoir". Come on! That's just too bizarre for me. The PetSmiling folks, though, seem sincerely sympathetic to your lonely pooch's needs and desires.

"The majority of non-neutered dogs spend a good chunk of time looking for something to hump. They try pillows, furry creatures, people’s legs and even other animals."

"During the doll’s test period with a few canines, including the Maltese Flock (responsible for the idea), the pets showed a better quality of life based on less anxiety, less barking, and less territorial demarcation. In other words, the dogs live a better life, satisfying their repressed sexuality, in some cases for many years."

The synthetic surrogate is produced in three sizes and each arrives with a tube of lube to "increase the useful life of the doll." Not sure who would ever want to apply canine KY before, or clean the reservoir after, but I know it won't be me. Sorry Fletcher, you'll just be finding Milkbones under the Christmas tree again this year; no DoggieLove for you.