Declaration

Bemidji is a sleepy college town in northern Minnesota. The “First city on the Mississippi”, the “Curling Capitol of the States” and home to those giant statues of Paul Bunyan & Babe The Blue Ox that grace so many a postcard sent off by  Northwoods vacationers to their loved ones back home. The city of Bemidji also has a lot of beaver.

It all started earlier this year when the city called for new works to be displayed in The Bemidji Sculpture Walk. They called it: the Beaver Project and it was hot. Local artisans submitted  pictures of their beavers for review and ten were asked  to paint their beavers on  fiberglass casts. The city of Bemidji then unleashed the 4’ tall sculptures upon the downtown area as part of a public art campaign. Suddenly,  Bemidji had the beaver fever. There was a big brown beaver, a blushing red beaver, even a fishy beaver. But one particular beaver aroused more than a few citizens when they saw it.

You see, as some folks strolled downtown Bemidji over the July 4th weekend, they stumbled upon artiste Deborah A. Davis’ beaver. Some were startled. Some were shocked. Some were steamed. Why? Because they didn’t just see a beaver, they saw a beaver with a vagina; and they didn’t like it. "It’s pornography!" they cried and they called the city of Bemidji to complain about Ms’s Davis’ porn. I mean beaver. I mean vagina. I mean beaver vagina. It got to the point that City Manager, John Chattin, didn’t know what to do… so he yanked it. The beaver, I mean. They pulled Ms. Davis’ beaver off the street to give the city of Bemidji some time to respond to the complaints.

“Gaea”, as Ms. Davis’ calls her beaver, was relocated from the downtown sidewalk to the front lawn of Bemidji Sculpture Walk Committee member, Al Belleveau, while the City Council prepped for an emergency town meeting on Tuesday. Ms. Davis herself couldn’t comprehend the controversy. She was all:  "My intent was to paint Mother Nature, Mother Earth…I didn't understand that some people saw genitalia...I understand people see different things in art, and they need to be free to do that…My intent was to paint a praying woman."

A praying woman, huh? I can’t wait for you to see Deborah's beaver! So let me finish this up. Long story short: The Council ultimately voted, unanimously, to bring back the beaver after even more complaints came in calling foul on the city’s censorship of art and expression. Several artists even covered their own beavers in a sign of solidarity. A few days later, Gaea was positioned back on her street corner and Ms. Davis was allowed to show her beaver to the public. Good for Ms. Davis and her “celebration of womanhood” and free speech and all that. Now check out her beaver...

In case you can’t figure out which beaver I’m talking about, it’s the 3rd beaver from the left;  the one with the three foot tall vagina painted on it. But, I don't know, maybe you only see Mother Earth praying with roses falling from her hands? That would be weird though. View Ms. Davis’ beaver, up close, and tell me what you think. A praying woman that looks like a vagina or a beaver with a vagina that could maybe, possibly, if you're really farsighted, be mistaken for a praying woman?

If you're in Bemidji this summer and want some beaver shots of your own, Gaea is located on 4th St. NW at Beltrami Ave. NW.

OMG

Oh my God, OH MY GOD! Dude really likes rainbows. And maybe mushrooms?

Go Fish

The Badger State Bass Brawl ended in a stalemate. Though, unofficially, I declare victory with the most bass (21) and the heaviest (4+)! Todd landed the 1st fish and, probably, really, hooked the heaviest too. Unfortunately for him, in his excitement, he forgot to weigh it! Oops. Too bad, so sad, I win. We had a great trip though; even with the crazy weather. Nothing like last year’s storms, but it changed from hour to hour. It was rain, then wind, to wind and rain, to a little sun, then a downpour. It made it difficult to establish any kind of pattern. Except on the last day when they were exploding on buzzbaits in the rain! That was fantastic bass fishing, let me tell you. And the 16 footer was a blast to fish from. Held up great the one time we were hung up on a submerged stump for 15 minutes.

The place we stayed at was perfect; kind of. We were in one of 4 old and rickety cabins; surrounded by 200 or so old and rickety RVs and trailers. But things were quiet, the people were friendly and the beds were surprisingly comfortable. There was a certain amount of strangeness here too though. We were in central WI after all. Luckily, it was all out on the water this time. First off, the dang Northern Pike were a menace. I landed 2 and TP lost about half a dozen baits, maybe more; including an expensive Honeybuzz; maybe two. That was a bummer. I did land the biggest northern of my life though. Pretty cool, until I had to get the hook out of its toothy jaws.

We also met a family of bald eagles. Again, cool, but a little scary. Within an hour of our initial launch, we spotted an enormous bald eagle soaring about the lake. For all 3 days it was constantly flying overhead and perching itself atop the pine trees that lined the lakeshore. On one swing around the South end of the lake, we saw its nest and let ourselves drift almost underneath it. That was until momma Eagle came swooping in from the North. She was so close I could see the steak knife sized talons at the end of her legs as she flew over us and up into the nest. We were about to get out of there before we ticked her off  but, just then, two adolescent eagles popped up from inside the nest. It was such a National Geographic moment. We just sat there for a while, watching them,  in awe of the wonder of nature all around us. Then one of the lil’ dumplins climbed up to the edge of the 6 foot wide structure, some 60 feet above our heads, turned around and shot a massive load of poop straight in our direction. We were done with nature after that.

But the strangest thing we encountered were some Cheeseheads in another boat. We were cruising a shoreline and they were anchored, fishing for crappie. They had their CD player fired up and it was pretty annoying. Not because it was rap, but because it was loud. I had to laugh when “You Can’t Touch This” came on. Next up was “Ice Ice Baby”. It was very odd to hear these in a place like that. And then, at the same time, TP and I realize it’s not actually Vanilla Ice, but a cover of the song and they’re singing “Ice Fish Baby”. We're both like, WTH? Next up was “I Like Big Bass and I Cannot Lie”. It was a cover album of tired rap tunes with the lyrics changed to sing about bass fishing. Only in Wisconsin. I fired up the big engine and headed for the opposite shore just as “Shoot, Deer it is” came on.

U Can't Catch Fish