No One Hit Wonders

Humidor? We don't need no stinkin' humidor!

You Look Like a Rube

Check out our Secretary of State. Do you think Dr. Condoleezza Rice ever killed someone? Well, let me rephrase that. Do you think Condi's ever killed someone with her own bare hands, I mean. I bet Ms. Desiree Anita Ali-Fairooz pondered the same notion the instant she got this close to the good Dr. Funny how the provocateur looks to be the scared one. "A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti."

It's true, I swear

A British University has discovered "the relevance, and even the importance, of using non-conventional & sometimes uncivil language in the workplace" and describes it as an "emotional release & effective way of promoting social relationships with others."

Apparently, cussing at work proves to be a benefit to employees and their employers. Sounds like we really can never mind the bollocks! At the office at least.

Professor Yehuda Baruch found that the regular use of profanity not only helped individuals articulate their feelings and reduce tension, but also boosted camaraderie amongst co-workers. The Prof, and his grad student co-author, set about to challenge leadership styles and examined the use of expletives and swearing in the work place from a managerial point of view. They are now warning that attempts to prevent workers from swearing could have a negative impact on business. The study notes that "swearing was as a social phenomenon to reflect solidarity and enhance group cohesiveness, or as a psychological phenomenon to release stress." The study surmises that "by allowing staff to swear as a means of expressing feelings of frustration and tension...working conditions could improve". The pair notes that "abusive swearing" should not be allowed, as that may add to workplace stress. Cursing in front of customers and management should be avoided as well. The investigation concludes that "taboo language serves the needs of people for developing and maintaining solidarity, and as a mechanism to cope with stress."

I don't know how much time and effort Professor Yehuda took to study this "phenomena", but I have one comment for the researcher: No shit Sherlock.

The article, entitled "Swearing at work and permissive leadership culture: when anti-social becomes social and incivility is acceptable" is published in the current issue of the Leadership and Organization Development Journal (Vol 28 Issue 6, pages 492-507) and is probably not available anywhere you're going to be.

Note To Self:

Take a deep Pranayama breath...

My children are not trying to be defiant or rebellious on purpose. They're just expressing their growing independence and do not have the language skills to easily express their needs. Ideal children do not always agree with their parents. Ideal parenting does not prevent the Terrible Twos; it only helps children navigate them.

Breathe out.

Breathe in...

My children are not trying to be defiant or rebellious. They're just expressing their growing independence and...

Happy second birthday babies. You are my joy.

Czech Your Head

After tolerating months of idle speculation and allegation, a proud father in the Czech Republic decided to take Maury Povich measures in an attempt to quell the rumors that were flying rampant down at his local saloon. Libor himself thought it odd that his infant daughter, Nikolka, bore no resemblance to him, whatsoever; but could only take so much of his drinking buddie's jabber about his wife's alleged infidelity. So, to shut their mouths once and for all, he scheduled a paternity test. And wouldn't you know it, he was not the father. So Libor Broza confronted his wife, Jaroslava Trojanova, who denied any extracurricular activity and, to prove so, submitted to a DNA test herself. And wouldn't you know it, she was not the mother. Surprise!

The couple quickly questioned the local hospital and found that 4 other girls were born that same day, 10 months ago. It didn't take long to identify the parents who took possession of their biological child in a, apparently, really bad mistake. However, along with Nikolks'a physical appearance, there were other inaccuracies that should have been a red flag for, I don't know, at least someone. Like how the infant's weight dropped from 7.26 pounds to 5.83 the day after she was delivered. "We were overjoyed after the birth of our baby, we did not pay any attention," Libor told a local newspaper. It sounds like papa Libor spends a lot of time at the pub, but was their Dr. drunk too?

Regardless, imagine hearing something like that! "The child you've raised since birth really isn't the child you birthed. Whoopsy! Our bad. But the good news: we do know the parents we gave your baby to. Oh, and you have theirs. Sorry 'bout that." How do you cope with that kind of news? What does it do to your relationship with your child? With your other child? What does it mean to be a "parent"? It's an imbroglio that lays bare heaps of moral and ethical perplexities. The potential intricacies and ramifications are, undoubtedly, life changing for everyone involved. It's not like you just meet the other couple for dinner and a Yankee Swap. Or do you?

All I know is that on April 23rd, the date our 3rd child is predicted to arrive, I'm not letting that kid out of my sight.